I went the whole day without realizing it was Father's Day today. Every other year, I've had a breakdown around this time and/or around April 5th, my father's birthday. The reason is that there's a aniversery effect even years later after a loved one passes on, and especially in my dad's case, because he was such a pivotal figure in my life.
I might regret slightly not going to church this week, but he didn't like my church anyway. He thought it wasn't a real religion since we had no core beliefs. That's just as well.
I just started thinking about him randomly a few minutes ago, like I often do, even without remembering it was Father's Day. One MySpace bulletin reminded me, and then I realized I thought of him right at the right time. I do it anyway so it's not like it's fortuitous, but it's good to remember.
I want to be a better person so that just in case Heaven really is a place
and not a state of mind, I can go there and see him again. He's always there anyway because I dream of him often. He always tells me he's still alive but I'm the only one who can see him. He is still alive and helping me and leading me to do good things. Even when I do bad things, he doesn't get as angry as he did in life. He had a very harsh temper, and there was no crossing him when he had his mind set to something. Most of my mother's family could not get along with him, and so we were alienated from them during his life. I visited my cousins occasionally, and I saw my grandfather once in a blue moon, but not too often considering we only lived three hours away. Life happens that way, and there's no stopping it, I suppose.
Time does not heal all wounds, but all wounds don't need to be healed.
 Here's a link to a website devoted to celebrating holidays one day at a time, today featuring Father's Day